So for the sake of Christ, I am well pleased and take pleasure in infirmities, insults, hardships, persecutions, perplexities and distresses; for when I am weak [in human strength], then am I [truly] strong (able, powerful in divine strength). (2 Corinthians 12:10 Amp)
My 39th year seemed to be all about my health declining and my medical prescriptions increasing. I started the year off continuing to do intense work outs (cross fit) 3-5 times a week, to collapsing on the couch after my work outs and needing to sleep for a couple of hours, to not being able to do my work outs because as soon as I started - I was too exhausted to finish. I had to wear a heart monitor for a month, discovered I had tachycardia and recently atrial fibrillation. I have already been on blood pressure medication for 12 years, I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis for my 30th birthday and in the past year I’ve been treated for high cholesterol and insulin resistance (metabolic syndrome) which has caused me from being the girl who could lose 10 lbs in 2 weeks to the girl who gains weight from looking at a cookie. And last but not least at the ripe age of 35 I had a complete hysterectomy (both ovaries gone as well) and learned what suffering through surgical menopause was all about - hot flashes are no joke!!
I’ve always believed in healing, so when I started coming down with all these chronic conditions, I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t healed - which can cause a lot of guilt for a person of faith, making you question where you stand with God, wondering shouldn’t I be receiving a miracle? But today as I was taking one of my many prescriptions, I realized I was looking at this wrong. Paul’s words came to me and I remembered the thorn in his side.
even though I have received such wonderful revelations from God. So to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud.
Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. (2 Corinthians 12:7-9 NLT)
I may have weaknesses (lots of them), but I've got God's strength to make it through. The various conditions I have, they aren’t something I necessarily need healing from, instead maybe just some lessons to learn from. One reminder I needed was that medicine doesn’t just come in a bottle, it also comes from my Bible.
He sent out His Word and healed them…(Psalm 107:20a NIV)
God's Word is healing to our minds, our spirits and our bodies. We know that God can take anything that the enemy meant for harm and use it for His good and perfect will (see Romans 8:28). My healing may take some time, depends on what lessons need to be learned, but I am confident that God’s timing is perfect, we might not understand it now, but there will come a day when it all makes sense.
For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, says the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8-9 Amplified)